last time

from the leather big sis vaults

I.

the last time we partied together you’d come on the train to see me at home like a normal adult with friends does. your abusive wife was not happy about it but agreed, finally, that you could.

we got dressed together, listening to music & rolling joints & having a couple drinks with my girl who was skipping out on the party because she had finals. i kissed her goodnight & told her to sleep in daddy’s bed not too late. when the cab came, you opened my door before walking around to the other side, the perfect balance of chivalry & nonchalance. we were already coming up in the cab & when we got out, i spotted a definite party girl smoking outside the building on durocher & asked if she was coming from a party & which door.

it was the basement this time, faint mildew scent underneath the cigarette & weed smoke, booth tucked in the corner, a few chairs scattered on the edges where the light barely reached, black & white painted spirals & geometrics chipping on the walls. we circled the room & then circled each other into a spot on the dance floor where we could…

II.

in a dark corner you’re smoking, sitting legs wide & i’m sitting, legs wide, facing you close. our thighs brush; our legs have touched more than any other part of us. you tap off your ash & it lands on my mirror-shine boot; you apologize & i say, but i liked it. you ash on my boots the rest of the night.